Its not the Gods who decide whom they will bless in their abodes each day, but a faction of His clergymen who determine who gets to see the Gods. So, who is the boss?
Basic science & philosophy, cheap parlour tricks, a world with misery & unhappiness and a big, generous heart; all you need to be a billionaire holy-man!
Google Earth has been progressively updating the eagle's eye view of Indian subcontinent. Being a travel and places buff, an enthusiast for urbanity, development and dynamics, I've found it pretty fascinating. Take a look and see the dynamics from the heavens.
Full and continuous updating of new Google Earth imagery is right here on this thread of Urban and Architectural Forum Skyscrapercity Forum. Go on, click and it will open in a new tab ---> Kerala towns and cities: Google Earth. Do sit back and enjoy with a cup of tea.
Trivandrum NH Bypass in 2005, and at present. Pictures tell the tale, highrises are comprehensively edging out coconut tree-tops along this stretch.
Technopark fringes. The 150hp engine behind Trivandrum's surge forward surely does exhibit the graphic metamorphosis of the once quaint suburb.
Phase III of Technopark has erased the greenery along the NH Bypass. Necessary evil of progress. But all for good.
Massive Software Campuses of Infosys and UST Global rising side-by-side. And in 2016 this frame will be completely filled by some iconic modern structures.
City dynamics. Pattom Junction. The erstwhile Gateway to the city is now a thriving downtown area. Numerous apartments and commercial complexes stand testimony to this.
Cochin. Kakkanad. Infopark.You know it all! The massive Wipro Software Development Campus fills the frame.
Panampally Nagar, Cochin. The premiere residential enclave is almost a concrete Amazon!
Green makes way to cleared, brown patches of land, then transformed into highrise shelters. Cochin vista continues...
Vallarpadam Container Terminal taking shape in 2005, followed by the finished product in 2011.
Marine Drive (Extension). Kerala's most premium waterfront address taking shape in 2005, and the present state. New bridges to the western archipelago and the waterfront boulevard connecting the North-western fringes of the city are ready now.
New apartments fill the waterfront montage on Marine Drive (Shanmugham Road) , Cochin.
The islands on Cochin backwaters have transformed since getting connected to the mainland. Vallarpadam Terminal and the Petronet LNG Complex seen here.
Kannur. Even smaller Kerala towns haven't shied away from embracing highrise culture. First image from early 2006.
Payyambalam Beach front, Kannur. Highrises propping up here and there making way for another gorgeous residential setting.
Lot more images are there in the Skyscrapercity link above. Do bookmark for continued and thorough updates from the members. Always thanks to M/s Google! :)
On way just have a look at the development showcased below. Let's look in an anachronic manner on this one, I'll show you how Hyderababd International Airport looks from above.
And this is how the placed looked in 2005. Oye!
Perhaps the most impressive and landmark model development must be theSabarmati Riverfront Development in Ahmedabad. The administrators of Gujrat's commercial capital have drastically changed the way River Sabarmati was viewed by the citizens. Kudos to the Gujrat Government. These sets of images prove my point.
The set of Google Earth images chart the rebirth of Sabarmati, which was another stagnant, clogged urban chokeway in 2007, but has now metamorphosed into the free-flowing bluewaters in 2011.
This will make matters more clear... Sabarmati in 2007
For decades, we, down in Trivandrum, have been shouting and begging for our TS Canal to be cleansed, made navigable and to turn the historic waterway into a waterfront haven for Trivandrum. Apart from ourselves developing sore throats, nothing has happened so far. There is no dearth of projects but there is one crucial difference. It stays put on paper.
One of my old photo-blogs depicts this sorry tale. Please do take a look >> TS Canal: A passage through time (Link opens in a new tab)
Those who think such developments aren't possible in Kerala, think again. If Gujarat could turn the clogged and dead Sabarmati into a world-class waterfront boulevard then why we cant we do the same? The funds we received for it as part of National Waterway III were allowed to lapse. Criminal! Surely we're missing something the Gujjus have in plenty.
This is a story of numbers, as it is a story of cities, but not a complicated one. Plain and simple mathematics when you look at it from my perspective, and from any common man's or business man's perspective. And those numbers portray a simple murky scheme, the way we, the people, are held at ransom by a few 'real' bourgeois, not the extinct feudal variety our Commie friends fight in their dreams.
Now aren't we all able to see through that?
The numbers & information in this post are mostly derived from Indianrailinfo.com. Sleeper Class data is based on the total SL coaches allocated to a train and does not reflect on the actual no of seats available for reservation between two cities. Eg: Kottayam- Bangalore sector may only have approx 100 berths in a 10 Sleeper Class, 720-seater Express Train. Trivandrum Central has been used as the base point for the post.
City #1Mangalore
Distance: 635 km
Capital of Dhakshina Kannada
Gateway to Konkan Railway and on to Mumbai and Gujarat
2 lakh Malayalees
Commercially imprtant city for North Malabar and a major educational hub for the whole of Kerala
Major Port and industrial city
Connectivity:
Road: Numerous Bus operators run overnight from all major towns.
Air: Kingfisher and Air India Express fly direct from Cochin
Railways:
6 daily Express trains including Netravati Express.
Total no: of trains available per week between two cities 15. This includes a Rajadhani Express, Kerala Samparka Kranthi and Kochuveli- Mumbai Garib Rath.
Another half a dozen trains run via Mangalore from Ernakulam.
Sleeper Class coaches available per week: 140 including 6 Super Fast services [inclusive of a Rajadhani, Samparka Kranti and Garib Rath] Two daily day-services, Parasuram and Eranad Expresses also service the two cities.
City #2 Chennai
Distance from Trivandrum: 909 km
Capital of Tamil Nadu
Major transit point for air travel and other Indian cities
5 lakh Malayalees
South India's major industrial, IT and entertainment hub.
Connectivity:
Road: State and Private operators ply overnight luxury bus services.
Air: Around half a dozen daily flights from Cochin and Trivandrum.
Railways:
4 daily Express trains, exclusive between Chennai & Trivandrum. The new budget has presented another Duranto which takes the number to 5
3 more Express/ Super Fast daily services from Ernakulam.
Korba- Akalyanagari- Raptisagar Expresses which operates on all days except Friday, run via Chennai Central.
Total trains connecting Chennai to Trivandrum stands at 11
Sleeper Class coaches available per week: 126. Includes 6 Super-Fasts [viz the Chennai Mail and the newly introducing Duranto]
City #3 Bangalore
Distance 840 km
Karnataka Capital City
IT hub of India; important city for Kerala's lone growing industry
10 lakh Malayalees
Connectivity:
Road: Private bus operators make merry at nearly double the fares on Chennai sector (for lesser distance)
Air: Over half a dozen daily flights from Cochin and Trivandrum.
Railway:
1 daily train from Trivandrum! That too the moving disgrace called Island Express.
Another daily express operates from Ernakulam.
A total of 6 trains connect Bangalore all the way down to Trivandrum
Sleeper class coaches available per week: 64.
One lone Superfast which runs 1 day a week! Then there's a tri-weekly GaribRath. So in fact, the no: of daily Super Fast trains connecting Trivandrum and Bangalore is a big, fat, mind-boggling 0
This Bangalore situation is so diabolical when you see that even Air travel is so well flourishing between Bangalore and Cochin/ Trivandrum, so demand or viability for another half-a-dozen daily Super Fasts is clear as daylight. Even Mumbai, a distant 1600+km of wilderness away from Trivandrum has 3 daily trains from Kerala, and a total of 17 trains a week passing through Panvel or directly to CST/ Kurla.
There've been persistent demands and agitations for better rail connectivity to Bangalore ever since the city gained its IT Hub status over 20 years back, and the excruciatingly slow Island Express is the lone daily train connecting Kerala's IT Hub at Trivandrum. Apart from the erratic new weekly services announced once in a blue moon, and that too deliberately on low-demand days, these petitions and cries have fallen on deaf ears.
The last of this cruel treatment of public has been the sudden rescheduling of the #12683 Ernakulam- Bangalore Express, which, following passenger agitation has been reinstated. [See Facebook page of Save 12683 Express for more details]
I'm drawing no conclusions to the tale; I leave you to draw your own. But is it too hard to understand, analyse or guess how Indian Railways are acting a business accomplice to private transport establishments?
As I said in the beginning, who isn't able to see the scheme of things? Crystal balls anyone?
Aryabhatta and ancient Indian mathematicians would've never imagined on how their '0' would run out of conceivable, comprehensible limits. First the CAG of the country put the nation in shock-o-shambles when our Corporates & Ministers drained the treasury dry, but now those exorbitant numbers have turned to pure euphoria when the ancient vaults of Trivandrum's trademark temple was opened.
Sree Padmanabhaswamy Temple
At last reports, its over 2,00,00,00,00,00,000 or a mere 2 Lakh crore, ( US $ 22 billion) and counting, with one last vault yet to be opened. Some speculative reports say it would be close to a cool 5 lakh crore or >50 billion US Dollars, enough to run the State of Kerala for a decade, after clearing out our 80,000 Crore debt, and to help out struggling European countries like Greece, Ireland and Portugal.
Padmanabhaswamy Temple, Trivandrum and Kerala struck front page on major newsmedia across the world; from NY Times to Guardian, from BBC to FoxNews. Money always makes headlines, doesn't it? Even the weight of Gods appear to increase geometrically according to the glitter of their chips.
And Voila! Here descends a whole breed of local patriotic-cum-parochial-class gentlemen on their personal hobby-horses, riding in all directions. One demand: "Spend it! Right now! Right now!" Right-wingers demand Sree Padmanabha University, Medical Colleges, spending it only for Hindus etc. 'Left'ies want it to be distributed among the poor! Some even want to build Vizhinjam port, Cochin Metro, Airports and a few Technoparks with that money.
May be if you come across
another secret chamber of a lost Pharaoh under Giza, how ludicrous it will be
to suggest to take all that money and distribute it among the poor. Who in their right senses
would suggest Vatican to sell those artifacts at Sistine Chapel to swell up 'community welfare' funds?
History is priceless, we just cannot sell tradition just like that.
Just. like. that. It's our pride, our roots. It is for our future generations to admire and learn where they come from.
Surely, those suggesting ready-cash-in of this priceless treasure must've gone bonkers.
Luckily all haven't lost it yet. Chief Minister Chandy has confirmed that the treasures are and will remain temple property, with the honourable SC reaffirming this stand. So Universities and Metro Trains and space-ships are out of the immediate schemes, at least for now.
So, now what?
Protecting the treasures within the temple is
theoretically and meta-ethically the best option. But there is a practical handicap to
this. Sree Padmanabhaswamy Temple adheres to, and enforces one the strictest customs and codes of Hindu religion. It
poses a very real challenge to the assemblage of security measures. Except for
peripheral beats and rounds, the Commandos with boots and guns are a big no-no inside the sanctum. Electronic devices and CCTVs are prohibited. Unless we assemble together a 'Swiss Guard'
type of exclusive protection force, protection is surely going to be a nightmare.
Another
is the cost factor. Initial estimates suggest as much as 30 Crores per month have
to be spent on security of the temple and premises.
The temple being in the heart of Trivandrum's business district doesn't make things any easier. The whole
Fort area is a notified heritage zone. Although strict building regulations are
in place, a further 500m radius secure zone is planned
around the temple. This may create unnecessary hassles for the dynamic
city center which includes hotels, shopping centers and bus-stands a stone-throw away from the temple.
East
Fort will probably never be the same again. Unless...
Unless...The
Govt sits down and decides to move this to a museum of International
Standards which will solve a few issues.The ownership could well lie with the temple or the Royals or whoever the Apex Court decides, but the $22 billion is the issue, whichever way we look at it.
A Travancore History Museum?
Encouraging to see some section of media proposing the idea of a 'Louvre' is Trivandrum. This is a discovery of unimaginable proportions as it is historically important. This has generated huge headline news the world over, that has created challenges but also opened up new possibilities for the Govt.
This is perhaps a God-given opportunity to globalize the name and fame of Padmanabha Swami's dear old Trivandrum. Kerala Tourism has done an exemplary job in marketing the Kerala brand, but except for Kovalam and Kochi, other destinations haven't yet cut a chord with outside world. Even many tourists visiting Kovalam and Varkala tend to appear puzzled when you say 'Trivandrum' or 'Thiruvananthapuram', but this is a chance to clear the haze.
Kerala, now has enchanting beauty, culture and and an astounding new legacy to show-off!
My argument is not for 'commercialisation of temple wealth'. It is NOT. As our left-wingers say, "Use it for the betterment of the lower sections of society", but how? How much money will reach the needy once it filters through our bureaucratic labyrinths? Especially in India 'maharajyam', where an A. Raja has already exhibited
with proof that even 1.76 lakh crore isn't much when distributed and
shared among a handful of corporates, cronies and well-wishers.
Let's look at Egypt. The desert nation has stamped itself as the heritage capital of the world by preserving their artifacts and opening them to the world to embrace its history and tradition. The fables of the treasures of Tutankhamen and the Pharoes have driven curious visitors in millions every year to unlock the mysteries and richness Egyptian Civilization has left us. Those pyramids & sculptures and the numerous museums in and around Cairo has helped Egypt reap benefits from their past through present and onto the future.
Same story with the other major treasures of the world. Most of them aren't in First World countries as we call 'em, but no-one is talking about auctioning them to build schools and hospitals, are they? They're all exhibited for the believers, the scholars and visitors to study and admire.
Isn't it a coincidence that this discovery has come as a shot-in-the-arm for Kerala Tourism, who took a bold step towards this culture-and-heritage bracket by the critically acclaimed showreel "Your moment is Waiting" last year in London? What better opportunity does Kerala Tourism need?
Look at the World over... They all exhibit their history, their antiquity, exhibiting their rich tradition. Paris, Cairo, Vatican, Istanbul... Now Sree Padmanabhan's Trivandrum has frog-leaped into that class. It's our glittery past, our wealth, our pride. It's not just showcasing stuff and pinching dollars.
Tailpiece: Ironic as it may seem, I've been part of discussions on what should be the brand-image of 'new' Trivandrum as the iconic frames of Sree Padmanabha Temple, Napier Museum, Kowdiar Palace, Secretariat et al were deemed to be outdated. The new Assembly Complex, Technopark, Infosys 'ships', new Airport Terminal were the leading contenders. How poetical, Trivandrum will henceforth, and befittingly be identified world-over by this one iconic image of Lord Ananthapadmanabhan's Gopuram, which has given this oriental city its name, fame, and now everything.
Kerala Assembly Elections 2011 will go down as one of the fiercely competed political tug-of-war India has ever witnessed. Almost like a lengthy Hollywood thriller or rather a T20 game gone down to the wire.
Concludes with red-faced winners staring down the barrel of not one, but a good few potentially lethal cannons, and the beaming losers already licking their lips to do what they do best: make mayhem in the Opposition ranks.
Statistical highlights:
UDF scrapes through 72- 68
LDF wins 9 districts out of 14, sweeping larger districts with 10+ constituencies. UDF has clear monopoly in just 3 big districts, Malappuram being one of them (thanks to Muslim League)
CPI(M) is the single largest party; Congress lost 49 contested seats (out of 87) when CPI(M) won45.
Just 1.68 lakh votes seperate LDF from UDF (a miniscule 0.58%)
BJP still unbelievably consistent: 0
Reminds of the odd cricket match where your batsmen made centuries and your bowler took a 5 wicket haul but yet you ended up on the losing side by a brace because of some Duckworth Lewis shit. Kinda South African cricket team jinx.
I'm afraid whoever leads the Commie Opposition may not have to sweat it out much as UDF themselves carry enough ammunition to blow themselves up to smithereens. In other words, I request you guys to let us live a peaceful life in our towns and cities instead of switching into a destructive mode as soon as you wear the other hat.
Nevertheless, there are a few positives amidst all the encircling gloom and confusion while the winners head towards Rajbhavan and then onto the Legislative Complex.
UDF will be well aware of the risk factors of this wafer-thin coalition and will be in a self-sustaining mode. How it will affect the equations and governing process of the state is anyone's call but these local parties have amassed Herculean powers to topple this Govt at the drop of a hat. Shambolic. These infinitesimal parties project more real threat to our democratic system than any of those extreme right-wing joints. Like this tweet has a point:
Time to wipe out all eerkil parties.This includes A-Z factions of Kerala congress. Cant remember the last political cause they supported
Congress has reasons to relax as well. Major troublemaker and nemesis of erstwhile Antony and Chandy Govt has finally yielded to the call of Yamaraj, no disrespect meant. Hoping for a United Congress without the I-Congress and A-Congress dogfights, but last time I checked I heard there was an OC-Congress, a RC-Congress and a VR-Congress. Did I miss anyone? Starfish variety.
Hopefully, and this is a big 'if', MMS and his treasury-plundering jingle bellers will realize that people are not jackasses to silently tolerate all the daylight robbery being white-flagged on those citadels along South Delhi avenues. Make no mistake, people are sick and tired of all this burglary which had repercussions on the minds of neutral voters, leading them to tick en masse the crystal image of VS Achuthanandan yet another time, against Kerala's history of yo-yo political pickings.
CPI(M) may very well understand the fact that 'individuals matter', even if it is a stubborn Marxist style cadre-hierarchy set-up. We all know where the Reds would've landed sans VS Achuthanandan. Even with my persistent non-left leanings it's hard not to salute and respect this person, a personification of honesty, selflessness and social-committment unlike any of our generation. The fact that VS chose to fast for Endosulfan-ban days after voting ended is a testimony to his commitment to people, not just to his party.
BJP, you still around? Personally disappointed with Rajagopal's loss at Nemom but it's pretty clear why BJP loses out big time. Lack of strong, influential leaders resulting in a disjointed, undisciplined and direction-less party workforce and tactics. This is an issue not just for BJP but also for all major political parties of our country, (with the exception of Communist Parties) where family-tree politics have dried up the step-by-step rise of able politicians.
Talking of a Congressman wearing the 'youth icon' leader's hat, being handsome and media-savvy, running road-stage dramas and live reality shows doesn't work. As a matter of fact for this Z-categorized individual, becoming more popular under 'Amul' tag, it's been one whip after another after another after another. Get mama to find you a woman and settle down in US or Italy. Don't even think of Amethi. Being a people's leader is a different ballgame altogether. Your numbers are DEFINITELY not working as evident by the numbers themselves: 4/243 in Bihar, 5/234 in TN and now Kerala.
Noone gives a damn to SNDP, NSS and those fringe groups, neither does Bishops and co matter much. My advice: Stick on to your churches, mosques, community welfare and stuff; please leave decisions as to who must rule the state to people. You don't represent me or majority of us Keralites. If you're so inclined towards knowing the 'communal angle' of proceedings, click this link >> Communal Analysis of Kerala Elections. [link opens in new window] It's simple, despite how that author has chosen to see the numbers, we can say 45% of minority communities have approx. 45% representation in Kerala Assembly! This should make all happy,
As always, we have tall hopes when a new Govt takes stage. Wishing the UDF Govt all the best to help India's #1 state reach where we belong.
The characters in this post may not be fictitious. Any resemblance to people, living or recently dead may not be coincidental either. The videos, logs, links, images and place names indicated in this post are used just for transparency purposes but this author may not fully endorse the viewpoints in them. No patent/ idea trademarks have been applied to this post and you can feel free to implement them if you've the business acumen. Good luck.
Since there are no crash courses/ diploma/ baccalaureate programmes in any Universities offering education and training in Divinity/ Godmen enacting, I propose this draft to aid and guide wannabe Gods. About time we recognize the demand for such a course and request the help of my readers to pressurise the Unis to include this programme as a new Bachelor of Arts subject.
How to be a Godman
Ok, Let's get straight to the topic.
Make up your mind: Think twice, thrice or a hundred times about this. Be extremely cautious as this is the most crucial step in the whole business. There is no turning back once you're in and established. Meaning, if you get bored of the con-work then it may mean disaster. Think of the virtues of life you're going to compromise if you take up the con-way, but in the end if you're successful it's all worth it.
Do some background tweaking: Will be a question mark in the future. So convince those around you, including your parents. Brainwash your mommy and daddy that you just appeared on their bed one fine morning in padmasanam position with the hands in utharabodhi mudra, that you recited Upanishads and vedas at 3 years, had aura around your head etc etc. If you've some shady past then do your best to cover the tracks.
Gather some basic education: Get well versed in a few essential subjects.
Religion: Learn all major religions equally well. Memorize some catchy phrases from the Gita, Bible or Quran. Learn to blend them well when you're giving your enlightening speeches or sending out news bulletins. 6 out of 10 may recognize the original source, 2 of those may come out in the open but we've still got 4/10 fooled and bamboozled by your cosmic gyan. Nuff! That's all what we need for a start.
Vedas: Precursor to modern Science, the vedas have accumulated incredibly rich and accurate scientific knowledge and principles, mostly encompassing local knowledge. Put them to use and see how the chakras work for you!
Astrology: Basic knowledge is quintessential. People come to you with an innate desire to know what's ahead of them. Get a handle on some tricks, build a database from prediction patterns in Astrology magazines and put them to use. Remember, always be vague.
Psychology: Be a good observer and listener. Learn body language and signs. Distinguish between the hardcore bhakts, the 50-50 folks and the WTF guys. Don't try your petty, raw tricks on the last category; they'll spot-bust you.
Kamasutra: This is a double-edged sword. Use it very carefully or you'll inadvertently end up slicing your butt. Once you're embroiled in women and sex then the quick-path to doom will be open.
Magic: There is nothing like some good, cheap parlour tricks. Try the capsule-with-bhasma-between-your-fingers trick, some disappearing-reappearing acts, turning stone-into-gold tricks etc etc etc. Master your environment and your subjects' mind and they'll even see you levitate, your statue drinking milk and such outrageous stuff. Yes, hysteria is a powerful phenomena.
Science: Trust in Science. Trust more in Medical Science, especially a wing called Psychosomatic Disorders. Acknowledge the power of mind over body; you understand that, your principles don't. Do NOT attempt to revive the dead, unless of course you're enacting a drama with your trusted pals.
Pharmacology: May be necessary at times, especially in the nascent stages of your career. Always be prepared with some powdered allopathic and ayurvedic medicines to develop the 'healing power'. Mix with 'bhasma' and instruct your followers to drink it along with some milk in front of your photo. This will work.
Politics: Learn and understand politics and politicians. Find out how they survive, which will provide valuable insights and route-map for your survival too. You need a specially developed skin which will put the toughest pachyderms to shame. And Indian politicians are one of the best evolved of those species on the planet.
Be prepared to invest in time and money: It will take some time to build the brand, so be patient. Give yourselves say, 5 years. This will be a testing time. Invest in some 2gram Gold coins/ ornaments(don't ever use rolled Gold),some good medicinal products, be benevolent and philosophical, participate in community charities, engage with people, utilize the oratory skills and cheap tricks you've perfected, talk some 'Cosmic Bullshit' which will shut traps.
Eg: "Known is a drop, unknown is an Ocean. Science just discovered 1% of Cosmic Phenomenon, there are 99% still left to be discovered, which may not be possible to explain through rationalisation"
You need such tactics and verses to shut these atheists, scientists and cynics. Always be wary of the educated and clever but keep in mind that they're still human. Try the 'aura', 'psychology' and 'hysteria' card.
Do some homework: Follow and go through the life cycles of your successful predecessors and identify common factors. Also look into the history of flop-Gods, some examples are illustrated in the latter part of this passage. Write down and memorize the do's and dont's. Build a personal library of some good philosophical quotes, proverbs and sayings.As we learned before, mix them well and use them in your enlightening spiritual guidance.
Brand building: Very important. Start from the name. The suffix 'ananda' seems to be in vogue but no harm trying to be different. Don't be hasty in demanding the title 'Bhagvan'. Allow time to acquire that status; its some kinda Doctorate in this subject. Start with 'Guru', 'Swamy', 'Mata' and so on. Synonyms for 'happiness', 'glory' or 'truth' with a connection to Sanskrit will be perfect.
Chose a colour which is not too hard on the eyes but strikes a distinctive connection with soul-related subjects. Say, saffron, yellow, blue, white or even black...Decide on the shade and style of attire you're going to chose. Even the hair-style and accessories could be important in giving this 'feeeeel' to your disciples and fans.
Take care in naming the Ashram too. Something connected to your incarnation avatar. Once you short-list your pseudonym, then christening the Ashram should be a cake walk.
Ashram location: My advice; build in a new place where there is plenty of scope for expansion. The site should have space for your all important, sprawling Ashram & appendages and must also have future provision for hospitals, airport, transport facilities, schools, work place, community support centers etc. If you're a visionary then you'll build a whole new town in your name, frequently visited by leaders of State and other VVIPs. Imagine that!
Always be vague:Don't be clear-cut when giving speeches or when predicting causes and courses. Don't say "There will be an earthquake on April Fools day." Rest assured, there wont be one and you'll be in s**t. Say, "I see the unhappiness of Mother Earth getting ready to unleash her potent anger to strike down on mankind when the stars move across the north-eastern planes at an oblique angle" Trust the "law of averages" and "probability theories". Next week if the Pacific Ring of Fire cracks, which it obviously will, you've hit bulls eye! Nobody will notice it if nothing has happened. Bingo! :)
Respect nature and natural laws: Remember, Mother nature is the lone power we have to fear. Do not even think about conquering her. In other words, respect the elements. God forbid, if a fire breaks out or a tsunami strikes, then get your ass out asap. Nature does not discriminate. Survive. Live to tell and hear your miracles another day. Always keep a handle on the real world outside even when you're deep inside your Matrix.
Continuing education: Acknowledge the need to develop your skills and knowledge. Don't always BS the same, repetitive stuff on stage; you need new numbers to attract new and more preys.
Continue reading books on the essential subjects listed above
Perfect your language Skills
Polish your oratory skills
Practice new magic tricks
Learn people and resource management
Practice and perfect Yoga and meditation
Prepare to be 'inhumanly' generous: Our USP! This is the best way to get some serious attention & loyalty. Poverty, misery, suffering and unhappiness sells everywhere in the world. Give selflessly to what the needy needs. Treatment for illness, money, free education, food and clothes, psychological support. This is your bread and butter. Once you're well off, then build hospitals for the poor, schools, small-scale industries to employ local women, orphanages etc. Also try your hand in social upliftment by constructing houses for the poor, plan and carry out water supply/ electricity projects for the community. This is what will boost up your name and fame, this is what will make you who you are, this is what will shut the mouths of people who criticize you.
Give back to the society what you get from them. Afterall our Govt itself is the biggest supporter of our business with generous tax exemptions, green-channel travel and Z-category VIP treatment. So use a percentage of these tax-free cash to generously give freebies to society.
Always be aware that there is nothing in the world like good mouth publicity.
Keep it simple:Classic example, this lady just 'hugs'. Yes man, she just hugs, and see the effect. Last time I heard the 'hug' was worth 2000 Crores.
In other words, adhere to basic psychological support, magic tricks and principles. Don't try to predict the day and date you're going to die or else you'll end up confusing a lot of your disciples like the late Baba who died a good decade early than he 'predicted'. Adhere to the 'always be vague' principle when acting the Nostradamus.
Do believe in the power of prayers. Prayer has been clinically proven to increase body immunity and even wade off conditions like Cancer. Yeah, it is called 'Spontaneous regression of Cancer' and attributed to physiological changes to the body induced by psychological mechanisms. So keep it simple through prayers, yoga, meditation and philosophical teachings.
Recruit: Make sure you've got some good, trustworthy professional personnel behind you, yeah get some MBA guys. An educated man knowing the tricks of the trade is always an asset.You'd need financial experts to manage your money, good investment advisers, media relations pros,political advisers and over time you'd need specialized professionals to manage your hospital business, media channels, print & press and a whole bunch of money minting ventures.
Make sure you gather some real loyal supporters who'd stand by you. Extremely crucial. C'mon, don't expect to fool everyone all the time. Someone will catch you in the act. Give people power and wealth that they'd stand by you.
Franchise: Even with all sophistication, you'd need someone in person who'd get grasp of local knowledge. Even USA has man-spies to infiltrate countries and organizations in spite of all those satellites and James Bond gadgets. So build pan-India, pan-World network. Get your disciples to open small Ashram branches in far away towns where you can keep a track of people visiting you.
Spread your wings abroad. Try Amreeka, Eurozone and co. What they have is money, what hey don't have is peace of mind. Offer them that in return for what they have. This is a successful ploy. And do I need to explain the significance of foreign money.
Draft visitor/ media policies: Ban mobiles, cameras, camcorders and such malicious stuff. It is almost impossible to perform miracles on tv other than cheapo magic tricks. Learn what our other rivals or contemporary men-of-magic have done on camera. No one has turned water into wine on visual record. Accept the fact that you're NOT a Lord Ram or Jesus Christ.
Remember, even the best swamis have been caught red-handed. This mischievous cameraman have almost poured water into a whole life work. And learn your tricks well; don't be a pathetic stage-magician like this baba.
Utilise business opportunities when it arises. There is always scope for an Ashram-based TV Channel or newspaper showing only the astounding 'miracles'. Take special notice that if you start a school or college, then include your story and teachings in the syllabus.
Always be in control: After a while even you may start to believe that there is something special in you. Don't overdo yourself. Learn from mistakes other wannabe Gods did in the past. Know the limits. Make sure you don't get too public with your fans like this idiot did a few moths back... Raasaleela is fine but not on Public domain unless you claim to be Valstyayana II or a Kamasutrananada. Well, even if you're so I wouldn't do this. Not acceptable.
Reassess the situation regularly: After a while even you will be dumbstruck by the miracle tales you hear about you. That you've healed cancer, you've brought rain to the desert, you've produced apple in the Papaya tree etc etc. Don't lose focus. Study where other fools have faltered...Some important Case Studies would be:
Santhosh Madhavan
Bhadrananda 'Thokku' Swami: Biggest donkey! He not only uses vulgar language on screen but brings out the real character in him. Don't involve too much in politics and controversial social issues; its not your take. Don't be an ass like this fella; a perfect case study of how not to act a Godman. How depressing! He also has a dedicated Youtube Channel to enlighten the 'masses' which is full of profanity, like this.
Lesson: When in a hole, stop digging.
Remember the Cardinal rules: Pay extra attention to the following sum-up points.
Never ever take up open challenges. Remember to be epiphanic and use juggle of philosophical phrases as explained above.
Don't lose focus. Remember, we're here for green bucks, not to be levitated straight to heaven
Keep your enemies far, detractors close enough but keep your friends tightly together.
Misery, sorrow and suffering are our bread and butter. Don't waste any opportunity to help people, win their trust and loyalty.
Treat all politicians equally and respectfully; never show discrimination.They're the one breed of people who can bring your empire crashing down overnight.
Just in case things go horribly wrong, try relocation, brand revamp, a new pseudonym and try tweaking your methods. If you burn your bum trying to be Vatsyayananda in Bangalore, then try being Ahimsananda in Ahmedabad or try the hugging-kissing exponent in Varanasi. Remember, relocation is the key here.
Bottomline: For every sensible person in this world you have may be a 100 souls willing to be fooled. They're your potential, they're your valuable customers. Don't mind the detractors too much; they're outnumbered. People will believe a lie screamed at you rather than a truth softly spoken.
Deccan Chronicle has featured yours truly and my better half in their continuing feature on NRI Malayalees. The article has been readied by my friend and reporter Ms. Cris Seetha, who has been kind enough to approach me for this piece on Easter Sunday edition (24/05/2011)
The column can be accessed online at Deccan Chronicle, Tabloid, on Glam Sham section, or follow the link below.
Anish Sahadevan is a registered nurse who lives with his wife Raagee and daughter Niranjana in Brisbane, Australia.
Born, bred and literally brewed in Thiruvananthapuram, he left his hometown in 2003 after graduating from the Medical College and roamed around before finally reaching Down Under.
But with the Internet, social media sites and other modern-day communication media, the links with home are still strong. But it is never the same as being back home in person. “Being a social animal, I find it sad not being able to actively participate in elections,” he says. “I want to be part of our politics, movies and development initiatives.”
He adds that the active interest with which he maintains his blog www.scorpiogenius.com over the past four years stems from his nostalgia.
“I’m a kind of person who likes to walk the well trodden lanes of my hometown even though it is for the millionth time,” says Anish. “I still go for that lone walk through the MG Road and if Kuttan chettan’s tea-stall has been replaced by a new age coffee shop I’d know that even now.”
“I miss the bike rides to Ponmudi, Kallar and Kovalam, spending vacation at my native village in Kayamkulam, thronging to see the movies on the first day, election time debates and of course, the famed street-side dosa and double-omlette,” he goes on and on.
But what he misses most is the time he spent with his friends. “Even when I am in Thiruvananthapuram now, I miss those old days. My friends have all moved on...”
Like most Malayais living abroad, he celebrates all festivals. “But sleeping with your head on a pillow is different from sleeping on your mother’s lap,” he says wistfully.
Anish has not yet made any plans to come back. “Australia has provided better scope for building my career,” he says. “But as you grow older, you grow fond of your roots and have this yearning to go back to where you belong.”
May I also take the liberty of putting up my response to one of the questions put forward by Cris. Not that there would be a whole set different answers to this one question even if you ask a hundred people, but this is one reply I gave Cris by walking in the shoes of people many years my senior. I've just stepped into the 30+ age category but you ask people approaching the fifth and sixth decades of their life, you could always see the obvious thrust to return back home.
Q: What is most intolerable about living abroad?
Ans: "The fact is that however naturalized you are to these alien nations, no matter if you no longer hold the Passport with the Ashoka Emblem, your hometown and state will always be an integral part of you. As you grow older, you grow fond of your roots and have this increasing yearn towards getting back to where you belong. But we've to build our own lives and perhaps the realization that you've to reset your life priorities over such nostalgia may be the hard thing to adjust. Don't know, just trying to be philosophical :D"
This blogpost intends to examine the USPs of two CMs known for their priorities and qualities in two Indian states at different poles. Gujarat, an industrialized, cash-rich state with a right-wing CM focused more on GDP, investments and co and Kerala, a non-industrialized, cash-strapped state with a left wing leader not so attracted to those numbers but having other priorities. This blog contains personal viewpoints and the comparison between the individuals and the states may please be seen in perspective. Full Disclaimer on Homepage tab.
In a state where Mahatma Gandhi was born, we have a leader now who confesses his targeting of Muslims, and yet, people vote him back into power. Hitler used to openly confess his contempt for Jews and yet people backed him. Modi is a bachelor, like Hitler. He is (supposedly) not corrupt (like Hitler). He is vegetarian (like Hitler) and has contempt for meat-eaters. He goes after his agenda which he makes it clear right in the beginning (like Hitler) and it involves targeting certain sections blaming them for all ills of the society. The economic prosperity in the land is high (like under Hitler), and his goons are ready to target and kill one community (like under Hitler) with protection from the state apparatus. Like Hitler, Modi practices and spends lot of time on mastering his oratory. Like Hitler, he creates an image and persona that is much more than the party and the ideology.
Modi is in-your-face candid about his wrongdoings (like Hitler) which people see as a sign of honesty in comparison to other weak and corrupt leaders who push the same agenda but are not honest about it. A known, strong and honest criminal is better than a hypocrite, weak and dishonest criminal – that seems to be the attitude of Indian people.
Some serious fun happened over the last evening which prompted me to put this post up. Prelude to it was one of the famous faces of Young India, the irresistible Chetan Bhagat being awarded some Youth Icon Award, and rightly so-so, and on way showering some exemplaries on Gujarat CM Mr. Narendra Modi.
"There is a dearth of good leaders in the country. But CM sir (Mr. Modi), you are doing well here (Gujarat), this is only one state and 27 are still left. We wish there could be many good leaders, but we don't have....IPL is IPL, and country's team is country's team. You think over it, rest of the things you will understand anyway,"
With the whole world knowing who Mr. Modi is and what he has done in/ for Gujarat, the statement gathered some serious flak. Amit Varma characteristically published a tongue-in-cheek tweet, which I found very funny. And my RT was picked up by Mr. Bhagat with a preceding I'm-so-very-innocent explanation
"Is Modi doing good work in Gujarat" is not the point of this post. Also, "Should Chetan have praised Modi the way he did" isn't the one we are so overly concerned about either. The critical question is "Can Gujarat do without Modi" and "Can India do with a few more Modis". I have clear-cut answers to both on a strictly personal perspective, mind you.
Modi isn't the first or last of the inspirational leaders India has seen, but I do hope he is the last of the ones who put Hitlar-ian dogma to practice. Though our patriarchal political system has kinda filtered the evolution of natural leaders with true vision, we still get our fair share of able men. 5 years ago Kerala threatened to throw up a dice which even shook the foundations of a party never based on individuals. I'm talking about Comrade VS Achuthanandan who mostly had a mind of his own when his stringent Communist Party of India thought the other way.
I'll get this straight. I'm no Commie sympathizer. I'm someone who firmly believe where an archaic ideology like Communism belongs to in our times>>> the Bin. In the same way let me say this. A Hitlar-ian segregation model followed by Modi shouldn't even find that elite bin in the history of mankind. It ought to go to the Shredder, converted back to pulp and buried deep under. Especially in a country like India where blood group is perhaps the last and least bothered way of classifying people.
The infamous and vicious communal politics played by Modi is now seen as a successful model by extreme right wing parties to spread across the nation. Neo-Indian way of Divide-and-rule which the British taught us a century ago. The current Middle East crisis teaches us it isn't rocket science to realize green bucks doesn't make a place heaven on Earth.
Just like Modi's Gujarat and Achumama's Kerala.
Gujarat has always been an industrial, prosperous state in India even before the twin natural disasters struck. Modi augmented the resources and the advantages to enhance the state's revenues and prosperity further to make it the Jewel of a 'Shining India' *cough*. But even with these multi-billion $ investments and profound urbanization, Gujarat still lags behind when it comes to Human Development Index, where Kerala pips every other state.
I'll let you compare what Kerala has achieved in the last 5 years compared to Gujarat. As always, head and shoulders above the rest of the states, Kerala didn't see even one small finger pointed at the premier public figures in power unlike the tales of Yedurappas, Chawans, Rajas and co whose scam-stories came down like monsoon showers on a June weekend. VS has done a far better job than Manmohan Singh in that aspect. He at least tried to clip the feathers of his mighty party boss on corruption charges and has won a few accolades. Remember the lion and mule idiom? No matter you've Harward Rank holders and IIM graduates in your Ministry, if the leader is a mule then that pack of 'lions' will just be effective as a bunch of mules.
Some say Modi has brought down corruption in Gujarat, fair play to him, but he has set extremely dangerous precedences to trust him as a leader of masses.
The fact is we're still officially 'Democratic Republic of India', and democracy without secularism just cannot exist. The issue is that a Party which ruled us in the last 50+ years fractured the pretty frame and meaning of 'secularism' and 'socialism' into something obscene.
Being leaders from opposite poles, Modi and VS cut drastically different images. VS, with all respect, is brutally committed to the people of Kerala, is honest, corruption-free, socialist, truly secular and bold. Positives. Only issue is that he is not a visionary leader for 21st Century but his Cabinet tried their best to make up for that handicap in the last 5 years.
Turn the coin 180 degrees and you see the other side of Kerala. Achumama transformed from a Dolby Digital Leader of Opposition to a mostly muted, 1985 Keltron TV system as a CM. Private investment has almost dried up (not entirely VS's fault but of his Party's), unemployment hits record highs, no vistas for revenue generation and the utmost crucial infrastructure development have literally STALLED...in full caps. It's more than worrying; Modi's Gujarat scores here. But Modi has inadvertently created a Frankenstein which will nullify any virtues of such physical and financial development, just like Hitler regime proved 60 years ago.
Modi? Committed to people of the state? ☑
Honest? ☑ (Going by Sujai's comparison on Hitler, that tick could well be a big, red cross)
Corruption free? ☑
Socialist? ☑ Visionary Leader? ☑
Secular? ☒
Unless Congress seriously tackles this tunneled minority appeasement policy, corruption and skulduggery asap, and oil the machinery of governance, people will completely lose faith in them. Period. This is what opens more avenues and catalyses activities for men-on-mission like Modi.
The lasting legend of VS Achuthanandan? It's never going to be his conquers as a Chief Minister, a shame in that sense. Now who was that who said Achuthanandan would make a good Opposition Leader but never a good Chief Minister? Probably right but hey, he did his job not-so-badly. But then, the legend of Narendra Modi? Godhra will follow Modi to his grave and generations beyond, no matter how honest and terribly sorry he is now for that.
Talking about Modi bringing tons of investments into his state, I can see another curious example. Andhra's ex- CEO Mr. ChandraBabu Naidu. He took Hyderabad (just Hyderabad) into such dizzying heights that it check-mated India's premiere Metros as Investment destination. In the case of Gujarat, Modi had another geographical/ demographical advantage compared to Naidu's Andhra. The former had more cities, ports and more evenly distributed population to showcase investors rather than one lone Hyderabad for Naidu. Naidu forgot all about the group of people getting increasingly pissed off at the green Hyderabad road-dividers while their fields parched under the hot Deccan sun. Gujarat exploited the geographical advantage; and from Valsad to Kutch, from Porbander to Gandhinagar, the state received equal wealth.
Coming back to Chetan Bhagat, there is a grey patch behind all the savvy, smart person that he is. He is intelligent, a gifted writer, an influential speaker, a responsible social activist, a true youth icon and all that. In the same sense he is so alarmingly rude, with practically no tolerance to criticism. He responds aggressively even to satires and acts on public domain like a spoiled juvenile going berserk when given out lbw on cricket pitch. He thinks too highly of himself and deems self above any criticism or jab. He is so naive that he thinks all critics are sort of 'envious' at his fame.
And dear trolls, u r really cool. am sorry ur book didn't get published or didn't sell. mine did. sorry. deal with it. 8 Apr
People who complain abt the tweets u write r like guests at home complaining abt the food. Hamne bulaya? Chalo niklo.15 Jan
He also takes a step further by blocking people on Twitter who take potshots at him or criticize him, which has come back to bite him very badly on more occasions than one. Chetan is yet to learn that he is now a popular public figure and such taunts and rebuttals are part and parcel of a celebrity-life like his, who gets involved deeply in social and political proceedings. Someone agile and educated like him should know the way to deal with 'irrational criticism' is to ignore it, if he feels it is coming from 'insignificant trolls' like me, for eg. Get real smart Chetan, build a bridge and get over it!
As for the statements on Modi, where he certainly went overboard with buttering, we can explain that. This is called 'scenario fulfilment' when people are under pressure especially in an uncharted, seemingly-hostile environment or may also be a case of 'being the charming guest'. In the past, it has happened to both the intelligent and the idiotic; Mr. Advani and Mr. Muscle Khan being examples from each group. Advani's portrait of 'the secular Jinnah' and Muscle Khan's characteristic mumbling on 26/11 happened under similar circumstances. So has Chetan's. Well...
When the lone focus is on the sensex, width of roads, IT exports, GDP and the big red line that divides < 1.25$-a-day poor and 2$-a-day 'rich', let's not forget this one fact. India can survive with a dozen Achuthanandans but not with another Modi.
Scorpio but NOT a genius| Trivandrum mallu| Keralite| full-time day dreamer and absent minded| urban enthusiast |Agnostic| humanist| travel buff| family man|
City dynamics. Pattom Junction. The erstwhile Gateway to the city is now a thriving downtown area. Numerous apartments and commercial complexes stand testimony to this.
And this is how the placed looked in 2005. Oye!
